My daughter just turned ten. When I visited my parents a few days before, my mom gave me a sealed envelope she addressed to my daughter.
She just had me help put together a card and check for my nephew, so I was curious what she put in the envelope for my daughter. She initially suggested I buy her a gift.
When my daughter was opening presents, she gets to the envelope my mom had made. For years, my mom would write little poems, which is what I was expecting to fall out.
Instead, the envelope was filled with various pictures from my parent’s life in the past decade. One was a picture of my parents with my daughter, but the others included a picture of the lake at the retirement community when it was under construction and a picture of the empty deck at my parents town house.
My husband and kids laughed — it was an odd collection of pictures in a funny strange way. I felt the angst my mom must have felt in trying to put together the envelope for my daughter.
I feel like I’m getting a little to close to the flame and need to pull back so I can continue to help my parents without burning myself out. I need to find the humor — things promise to only get more difficult.
Whether its funny strange or funny ha-ha, I need to see the humor in our situation. Acknowledged.
Kay, my two cents on your thoughts here: I dont think you need to force yourself to find the humor. Some incidents like this are just plain sad. Not to sound all Opra-esque, but maybe its okay to just feel bad about what is lost when it strikes you that way, then you may indeed find the humor in another story tomorrow. I think you have a remarkably healthy frame of mind, give yourself a break.
Thanks – I was worried I was getting a little too dramatic. Some emotion about it is healthy, albeit, not comfortable for me.
Hi Kay,
I think this is going to be a question for us to explore on the Dementia Dialogue?!
We use humour a lot in this house – Pete calls it like being in a threesome, that is, two is company and three (dementia) is a crowd! I have named our threesome The Three Stooges, and Mr Dementia is Larry!
As Melissa said, it is ok to be emotional, in fact good for you.
With love and hope,
Kate
Thanks and GREAT idea!
The humor comes and goes. Sometimes you can laugh and sometimes it’s just too overwhelming.
Thanks, glad to know I am not alone!