My brother shares his stories from his visit with my parents.
I visit my parents often to check in and help with what I can. This covers car maintenance, home repairs and health appointments. Recently, my mother is becoming more challenging and belligerent, while my father is less and less “there.” Any time I remind my mother of an event we have reviewed and agreed to, like a home repair, she immediately grows suspicious, and now constantly says, “Prove it to me!”
When I show her the proof, she then either says “I don’t believe you,” or she finds a way to defuse the situation by saying she will check HER records (which means her calendar or checkbook) to see if this is accurate. Usually it ends poorly after 15 to 20 minutes of going round and round.
There are times when my father will yell, “Listen to him!” only to be berated himself and he pipes down as he too is very tired of this ridiculous and vicious circle of illogical sparing and mistrust sprinkled with a mean spirit. Aggravated.
the arguing goes on here with my brother also. it is painful, because he is always sure what he says is right, and he truly believes what he says. he doesn’t like to hear me say, what is actually happening
OMG. Do we share the same parents? Hard as it is, and frustrating as it is–as I’m sure you’re aware, the gentle approach works best.
THEN go outside and SCREAM!
Hang in there!