When my brothers were in town two months ago we met with the staff at the retirement community. We were surprised to learn that their impression is that my dad is in more need of support than my mom.
After my brothers spent several days with my parents, they understand why. My dad has no short-term memory and no real interest in doing anything. They offered to take him to play racquetball and he wasn’t interested. One brother commented that every time they entered a room he would seek out a chair and immediately sit down.
When my dad broke his hip several years ago, he made an amazing recovery because he was in such good physical shape. Within three months, he was back on the racquetball court at the age of 79. He loved to play racquetball but now has no interest in playing.
In our meeting with the retirement community, we are told the concern for our parents is a dignity issue. My dad has been getting very agitated in public and yelling at my mom. We know that on several evenings he has had to be escorted back to their apartment.
We believe my parents need to transition to assisted living, or consider getting a companion, but our parents will not consider any changes to their current set-up.
Independent living is no longer the solution for my parents. They need someone who can help them adapt to the retirement community and to a new schedule so they can make the most of their days. Hoping we can figure out how to make this happen. Challenged.
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