No one has a Christmas wreath up now!

wreathMy daughter has a snow day and the snow didn’t quite pan out, so we decide to go visit my Mom. When we arrive, my daughter finds the Christmas wreath hanging on the back of a chair and asks Nana why the wreath isn’t on her door.

My Mom barks out “No one has a Christmas wreath up now.” A silent “huh” plays in my head and I see the same expression on my daugther’s face. I tell my Mom that “We passed quite a few wreaths in the hallway.”

My Mom doesn’t resort to her prior habit demanding we “prove it“, but challenges me to “show me another wreath” in not a very pleasant tone. I open up her door and point to two wreaths within sight of my Mom’s door.

“Oh, then lets put it back up.”

A week ago her Christmas tree disappeared and we found it hidden behind a chair in her bedroom.

I now have been through it enough and recognize that my Mom is moving through periods where she doesn’t recognize that Christmas is coming. I imagine that she takes it down believing Christmas has passed. She now is unable to really grasp time and it’s passage. When she did this previously, I just thought it was poor memory. Now I recognize that she can’t conceptualize the difference between a week, month or year.

She’s trying so hard to keep it together. We can still sit and have a nice visit together and share a meal – and for that, I’m grateful. However, the deeper she moves into this disease, the harder I sense she’s fighting to manage. Watched.

4 thoughts on “No one has a Christmas wreath up now!

    1. Thanks for your note.

      Follow your gut. It’s easy to dismiss, ignore, and placate the changes.

      It’s a long road and there are many of us here to help you navigate the difficulties ahead.

  1. Great insight. No wonder your mother (and many other dementia patients) are so frustrated. I would feel so disoriented if I could not keep track of time.

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