My sister came to visit to help chase down my Mom’s medical issues giving me a break and allowing me to focus on my daughter’s foot surgery. The true sandwich generation dilemma — both Mom and daughter need medical attention and care right now.
My daughter is only 11, but had chronic foot pain due to an extra (accessory) bone that outlasted all the non-surgical options we pursued. She stopped dancing and gutted out soccer as the goalie to help her team who lost two players due to broken bones. Surgery was a few days ago. Thankfully, it went well and I just finished spending the last two days as foot-maid (pun fully intended).
My sister just returned home yesterday and my Mom just called telling me her “cupboard is bare.” Not only does logic tell me she still has plenty of crackers and chips, she is in a community that serves every meal and that also has a “store” where she can pick up bread and peanut butter and jelly if she really is out of supplies.
However, I immediately feel guilty and assume my Mom is reporting facts. I can’t stop the urge to believe my Mom. I’m not sure if I ever want to lose that ability because it will mean I know my Mom is lost to me for good. Reflected.
I love the “sandwich” comment — yes! That is exactly where I am also: 4 daughters and my mother — except I also caregive for my grandchildren 2 day a week!! A triple decker club 🙂
Wow – a good club sandwich is hard to beat! Keep it up!
Glad to hear your sister was able to help out for a bit and that your daughter is recovering nicely from surgery. It is so hard when we look our loved ones with dementia and see the same person that we’ve known all of our lives, but the words they say don’t always align with reality.