Tag: cancer

The wait for a diagnosis

pleasewaitIt took several months and varied doctors to find that my Dad has a tumor in his mouth. We started with the Oral Surgeon who has referred us to an Ear, Nose and Throat (ENT) specialist and orders a CT Scan. It takes several days before we can get appointments. Our first is to get the CT Scan.

This time I arrive with forms filled out. After a short wait they escort my Dad back to perform the scan. He returns a half-hour later. While we wait, I looked for local places to eat that would interest him. He has always been an adventurous eater. I find a local place that is well rated on YELP that offers empanadas. I tell him what I found and he agrees to try it with me.

We arrive and order a few with drinks. He tries his best to enjoy the food, but I can see he’s having trouble with anything that has texture. I realize that he should be on a liquid and soft foods diet. Eating is just too hard for him now.

I wonder how this could have progressed so far without anyone in his Assisted Living community noticing and even having it go undetected at his annual physical which just happened a few weeks ago. We now know something is very wrong and it’s going to take a few weeks to even understand it and learn if there is anyway to make him comfortable.

I sense a new lesson coming on. How will we manage cancer in my father who is also dealing with dementia? Vexed. 

Dementia and Cancer Treatments

road to nowhereMy nature is to imagine the road ahead. It took me a while to recognize that it was a valuable skill in the business world, I’m not sure it’s a good trait to have now.

We have been told that my Dad has “Squamous Cell Carcinoma” in his mouth. Apparently, it was too large for the Oral Surgeon to treat and we have been referred to another doctor – an ENT (Otolaryngologist) who specializes in oral cancers.

My Dad is now a ghost of the father, leader, thinker, joker, husband, friend and man that we all knew. If you are a regular in his life, he can recall some recent events, sometimes in shocking clarity, but most people, events, locations and accomplishments have disintegrated.

My Dad is not leading the life any of us imagined retirement to be. He is no longer interested in playing racquetball, looking through his stamp collection or engaging in social activities.  He will ask you on a visit to share current events in your life and does ask for my family members by name.  He can inject jokes into the conversation and when music is playing, his eye’s light up and he will tap his feet, drum on the table to the beat and even get up and dance on occasion.

We have no clear diagnosis, but the fact that the Oral Surgeon is doing nothing and referring us to another doctor doesn’t sit well with me. I am starting to prepare myself mentally for what may come. Braced.